New Music: 404 Shawty

I did a post about some new music coming out of Atlanta a while ago called Georgia Boys to give y'all a taste of the music that will soon be taking over our airwaves and consuming our minds with infectious hooks and quotables upon quotables. I didn't, however get to share my favourite find from the A.

I'm always skeptical when it comes to new female music talent. Reason being, nine times out of ten it's nothing you even wanna bother to take past the first listen. Then on top of all that it's always on some super sap shit, some damsel in distress shit or some my boyfriend is this or that shit. zzzZZZzzzz....

I got tired of being bored and along came exactly what I was looking for. Actual talent without all the simpin'.

Check Out ---> Suite 404 - Miloh Smith

I'm kinda in love with her voice. Super easy on the ears, no annoying, high pitched, pop rap garbage. More mellow, almost Floetry-esque flow. Very stoner-worthy. Honestly, anyone who can sing about riding around with a gun so beautifully deserves my love. Guys and ladies alike will enjoy this project.

My fav tracks are Ounces, Burner On My Side, French and February 29th. The interlude is fucking beautiful too.

I'm willing to bet you'll like this so click HERE to download this dopeness.

The Articulate Bitch

2012: The Recap

My 2012 was the best and worst year of my life in so many ways. I like to get a little personal sometimes so here's a little bit of what made 2012 so memorable for me.... the good, the bad, and the ugly.

For one, on my 23rd birthday (October 12th 2011) I decided that if 2012 was going to be the last year on earth (which is obviously rubbish) I would enjoy every moment of my Jordan year, throwing caution to the wind and embrace irresponsibility in the name of savouring my "last moments". I spent every weekend at the same couple clubs building my network within the club industry with a few old faces and welcoming some new faces into my circle. Loved it despite so much hate. Quick shoutout to my club fam: Matt Mogul, Brooklyn, DJ Kicks, DJ Lissa Monet, DJ Whiteboy, Coco, Rich & the Wetbar family, the Time Nightclub family (Jack, Sarah, Mickey), Nammy Montana (LOVE YOU), the Scotians and the XO/CP Family.

I also experienced something for the first time in losing my ex (RIP R "F" J) which prompted the move from WPSSF to the creation of my solo project; The Articulate Bitch. I gotta say thank you to everyone who supported the move and my readers who made the move with me. I was worried for a while but it worked out wonderfully and I saw the numbers rise consistently since the conception of TAB. I got so much love and for that I am ever so grateful. I'm only here because of my readers, y'all don't even know how much I appreciate y'all.

I was blessed with the opportunity to do some work for dramaliketheDJ.com (granted it was gossip-ish but STILL). Had to be the best part of my summer, hands down. Getting to be on set for the My Moment video was definitely the highlight of the entire Caribana weekend. I haven't even deleted all the pictures yet lol. Oh, and I smoked a Newport with ASAP Yams (shameless statement, I know). Shout out Summer Walker (my Summajam) and Drama, they good peoples for real.

I wrote a post about long distance relationships in July. In all honesty, it was meant to be the summation of all the thoughts that had been consuming my mind for a while. I had been attempting relationships with a couple people by this time, all of which had failed. So I had a long talk with my mother, in which she shared with me why her long distance marriage had been so successful. My father had also just got married to a (very nice) woman who lives in Jamaica. So here I was surrounded by proof that long distance relationships can and do work. So I began wondering if the same could/would work for myself. I had already said I didn't care to date anyone in Toronto (sorry). Long story short, the law of attraction definitely works because soon after I wrote that post I was lucky enough to get the chance to find out for myself. He's dope, I adore him, shout out my king... blah blah blah lol.

That was the good. Here comes the bad.

In the "bad" category, my irresponsible party lifestyle put more than a dent in my financial life. All those cabs and food after the club and hangover remedies for the days I slipped up and drank the devil's piss (vodka) added up to my bank account crying for some restraint by the time denim jacket weather rolled around. Had I not had so much fucking fun, I would have said it wasn't worth it.

In the world of twitter it was the regular shit. Survived getting roasted twice, managed to abide by the first rule of twitter (don't react) when it came to the subtweets (and there were PLENTY) and even tolerated all the fugayzi Drake video recruitment spam. I also got a fantastic tweet threat which I will cherish til my dying days.

I went through more than a few boy dramas this year as well. Had one dude actually get real close to an actual commitment until he decided to let me know about his girlfriend (thanks again). Another dude thought he was the perfect dude for me since he was so laid back and nonchalant, little did he know, that wasn't at all what I was looking for. He's still a cool dude though. Had my last encounter with a light skin dude (see Louis Belt No Bus Fare) and discovered that I really didn't care at all for the fair skinned fellas at all. Confirmed why I made the decision not to fuck with baby fathers and even had to deal with a stage 5 clinger... who I haven't been able to get rid of yet.

In the females and friends department, I made a real effort to allow more pussy owning humans into my circle to no avail. Truth is, maybe I'm just not meant to have many females friends. Especially if they're going to stick their nose where it isn't welcome, if they're going to be fugayzi about things, if they're going to be petty about shit, or if they insist on being cool with people I obviously have problems with. That shit is dead. Ain't nobody got time fo' dat.

The ugly is a short list, but so relevant all the same.

The ugly of this year was more about shit I observed that I found to be repulsive. With the popularity of more high end brands and labels reaching new heights, so too did the frequency in fugayzi clothes and accessories. Exposing people isn't my style so obviously I won't go into too much detail but I will say this: a lot of these designer boys ain't worth the shoes they walked in on. Shout out to Dundas and Spadina for hooking so many of these niggaz up with that real real fugaga thang.

Vodka has to be on my list of the ugly for the simple fact that I turn into a drunken, uncontrollable, awesome mess. Every time I took even a half shot of vodka in a night, the result was a colossal failure. The night of Headliners, so many people got bottles of vodka late in the night I swear I helped about 4 people finish their bottle by the end of the night. When all was said and done, I puked so much I was vomiting breast milk. No country for vodka in 2013.



Not a whole lot changed this year for me besides my perspective on many things. I also changed my priorities, switching my focus more toward my future and long terms goals. I'm not one to make new year's resolutions, because I honestly believe resolutions should be made as the moment arises. I've been making resolutions all year long, as I learned more about myself, the world around me and the people I associate with.

We've come to the end of another year folks. The world didn't end and we're all still here. So what will make 2013 the defining year for you? I would tell you my plans, but you know me... I'd rather show you.

Much love to all my readers and followers, I adore y'all so much! Best wishes to all of you for the new year! Kisses to my misses and daps for my niggaz. See y'all next year.

The Articulate Bitch

Daddy Issues

Daddy Issues

I feel like I should begin by telling y'all not to judge but if you haven't figured out that this blog isn't the place for that shit by now... Maybe you need to direct yourself to media take out.

Promiscuity and callousness clearly aren't new phenomena. For years people (men mostly because thy dictate the double standard, thanks so much guys) have passed judgement on promiscuous females or heartless women. The main diagnosis for these ailments of the female psyche? "Daddy Issues".

I'm gonna speak on this from my personal experience. I'm not going to attempt to place these conclusions in every female.

What exactly are "daddy issues" and why are they such a detrimental part of a girl's life? Well, daddy issues can be witnessed through the dynamic of the relationship between daughter and father. Our fathers are our first examples of men. Little girls love their daddies. Daddy issues range in severity and type. Some women have grown up completely lacking a father figure, some grew up with a bad example of a man, and some grew up with a ghost of a man who just did the bare minimum but was never truly present.

Father figures are a vital part of life. They provide the guideline for what a real man is supposed to be. They teach their sons how to be men and teach their daughters what type of man is worthy of her. They are placed on a pedestal and looked to for guidance and security. When these father figures are absent or inadequate, the result is a daddy issue.

In regards to promiscuous females or HOES as we call them, having daddy issues creates a void. This subconscious need to feel loved, wanted, needed, appreciated by a man. So these females jump from one dick to the next seeking carnal male attention at all costs in hopes of finding the missing part of them. Validation. Men often have no idea how much the things they say and do affect us as women. A girl grows up with daddy issues it's either she's seeking the father she never had or replacing the excuse for a man she did have as a father. Sex is physical, yes, but in those moments however physical in nature, there's a need being filled. Now she is being needed by him, he wants her, she damn near feels loved. Is it backward? Yeah, probably but it's reality. Will hoes admit it? Nope. Probably not.

Heartless females are very similar in their actions but their INTENTIONS are very different. Theses females have been hurt deeply, and rather than seek the replacement or man to fill the void, they seek only instant gratification from punishing the male species by means of meaningless sexual encounters. You may be lost but allow me to explain. Shorty has her daddy issues, her motivation is not sadness or inadequacy, it's rage and vengeance. She wants men to feel as she does. She seeks to hurt them by inflicting the same pain she feels, on them. She takes complete control of her sexuality, which would be liberating and empowering if it wasn't for the fact she is just covering up her issues.

Daddy issues don't ever end at fathers. More often than not they are prolonged and often made worse by other men. Men females choose subconsciously believing they are better than the father who hurt them, when many times they are the exact same. So what happens? These girls get hurt again, and again and again. They become bitter, often times they lose their self esteem, they settle for the bottom of the barrel believing that is all they deserve.

It's pretty terrible. I have daddy issues my damn self. My father was a great father, but not the best example of a man. Multiple women, disrespectful behavior, and a self righteous attitude. I started out with the emotional vulnerability of the promiscuous female, seeking a better example of a man to have in my life. After a few heartbreaks, I became the heartless female. I treated dudes like the bitches they spoke so degradingly about. I punished the emotions of men and made them feel as small and insignificant as men had made me and PLENTY of other women feel. I flipped the double standard and reclaimed myself for myself. However, in the process, I desensitized myself, put my guards up and became brutally honest and blunt, sparing no feelings in the way. I rolled over niggaz like a bulldozer and never once looked back with even an ounce of regret or remorse. They never did when it was me so I owed them no kindness. I was shockingly successful. It was so satisfying.

That kind of female I had become began to scare me. She felt nothing. I depressed myself because I was unable to love, therefore unable to be loved in return. Luckily for me I could see the errors of my ways before my body count got too high and my emotions went completely numb. I pulled myself out of that hole pause. I had so much rage in me. I was so angry. My life began to reflect that and to me it was unacceptable.

Now, I'm a very different person. I'm not attempting to punish anyone, though I still come across heartless at times I've learned to tailor my love to suit only the person who is the object of my affection. Heartlessness became selectiveness. So far so good but I still have those heartless tendencies that make people think I'm "acting like a nigga".

Point is this: as a woman you can't go through life blaming men for everything. Yes they do fucked up shit, all the time. Yes they hurt us, but not forgiving them and MOVING ON hurts only US. We lose the ability to love purely the way we are supposed to. Bitterness, sadness, rage, depression... Let all of it go. Forgive those who have hurt you and forgive yourself for holding onto it for so long.

Live and love.

The Articulate Bitch

My Name is Molly

By now you've heard of this lovely lady Molly. She's the party queen anywhere you find her, and she's got a strong hold on the music industry as well. I've dabbled with shorty before so I thought who better to interview on this shit than the world's newest, most popular party girl?

TAB: Long time no, see. When did I last see you?

M: about a month ago at that hotel party. You had little faith in me that night until I rocked you.

TAB: Ah, yes. Fond memories. So, since we first met caribana 2011 you've been a busy girl. Why do you think you're so popular?

M: probably because I quit being so hard to find. After a certain point I was so available to certain people I became an everyday thing for them. Parties are still the most fun though!

TAB: Parties ARE the most fun. For those who don't know you or haven't partied with you, explain the experience.

M: I'm basically the life of the party. I'm gonna start slow and take my time to let you feel me then once you start rolling it's non-stop experience after experience. I make your eyes wide, your heart race. When you're rolling with me music is better the environment is amazing and you can drink like a fish. With me, fun and enjoyment is pure. I remove your anxiety and replace it with euphoria.

TAB: You do a lot for a person's confidence too, though. People have whole new personalities when they roll with you.

M: that's the best part I think. With me you're friendly, talkative, innocent and honest. I let people be themselves at their most social best.

TAB: I have great memories of our... Ahem.... Private encounters, too.

M: I remember them all, believe me. I bring out the energizer bunny in someone. Hours feel like minutes and every stroke, every lick, ever touch feels like its plugged into surround sound on your body. The buzz is amazing. I must admit though, as good as I feel, too much of me at a time makes it hard for dudes to get hard with me. Even just rolling with me makes it hard to nut if you're a guy. Ladies though...

TAB: How much is too much? Can I die rolling with you?

M: I'm an intense bitch. Too much of anything isn't good, but people have doubled or tripled or more on me and haven't had anything terrible happen. I'm a realistic bitch, common sense is everything with me.

TAB: But Molly, sometimes you're a dirty bitch and make a person feel like shit. The fuck is that about?

M: I have bad days too! When I'm dirty it's just because I've been treated bad. Some people don't take care of me, got me chillin' around harder shit that can contaminate me. It's not cool. I hate being dirty, people spend more time feeling paranoid and trying to focus the feeling into calmness to enjoy me.

TAB: Anything you wanna add before we come down?

M: Take your time with me. Fuckin' with me is intense so bring a couple of your friends to make you feel comfortable your first few times. Always try to find someone who has been good to me, so I can be good to you. I'm best when I'm clean I promise. Oh, and I'm good in brown, beige and white, depends on how I feel that night!

Shout out to Molly. Dope bitch.

The Articulate Bitch

Dream Chasing

Some of us dream every night, some not as often and still some never at all. We spend time searching for the answers to what our dreams mean hoping for some deeply subconscious solution to our problems.

Those dreams are all fine and dandy for you non-vulgar folks but for those of us with minds planted in the gutter we savor our dreams. Each lusty dream is like a real experience rudely interrupted by reality.

The great thing about a sexy dream is that it has no limits. It can be with whoever your mind wants, doing whatever your mind wants. The only limit in your dream is what you can actually imagine.

They day dream is a perv sport if ever there was one. Seeing a stranger in passing or just zoning out in your own thoughts, finding yourself strangely turned on by the brief moment you thought of something. I've caught myself in this before. To be honest I'm so alright with it, I tend to look around afterward almost seeing if anyone had the same thought I did, or if they somehow knew what I was thinking. Sometimes I even just smile to myself which is probably much more perverted now that I think about it. Don't judge me.

The intoxicated sex dream is often the most vivid and REAL of the dreams, I find. Much the same way drunk sex is some porno shit you've only ever seen and didn't know you could do. That high, rolling or drunk sex dream is the most intense thing your subconscious can do to your body. Shit gets real.

The influencer dream is the most common. This one is when your dream reflects something you were doing, thinking, hearing or seeing. Like when the last texts you were sending were some nasty, lusty shit and you fell asleep thinking about it. Sometimes it's just seeing or speaking to someone that can be the basis for a nice sex dream.

The finisher is my personal favourite. This dream is the one that feels the realest, lasts the longest, is the most satisfying. This dream is so good you either A) actually cum or, B) wake up in a sweat with something hard/throbbing & wet and have to finish the job on the spot. Don't for a moment think A isn't a reality. I promise you it's real.

I love a good lusty dream. It's like your personal brand of interactive porn. Plus it's part fantasy. So perhaps you should be seeking to make your dreams come true in a real and very satisfying way.

The Articulate Bitch

Porn, Glorious Porn

As usual, my friends and I smoked a blunt and engaged in a healthy and lengthy conversation about sex and porn. I love convos like these because you can learn so much about people and yourself too. Sometimes the things you think only run through your mind aren't so different than other people. Here are a few things we discussed and agreed on.

I hate dry porn. The girl is screaming and ramming it back but every time they hit the close up, not a drop. I DON'T GET IT. Where's all the juices?! His dick is dry as hell and these two BEEN fucking. I just get confused because the only dry sex I've ever been aware of is humping with your clothes on (I can't believe that was ever ok). Seems like most of this dry porn is white porn too.

In life a little moaning from a dude is acceptable, encouraged even. In porn, all that theatrical grunting and carrying on just throws me off (another reason I only watch girl in girl porn). Especially if you're trying to rub one out all that guttural shit these porn niggaz do is a turn off. Keep that.

When choosing the right "inspiration" for some alone time with your hand the pattern I've noticed is that most people watch what they themselves enjoy. So my homie, for example, likes girls in reverse cowgirl so when he watches porn that's what he watches. For me, I'm watching girl on girl for the head action. If I watch 'regular porn' I'm still only turned on by the pussy eating, I promise you.

What do you agree or disagree on? Comment below I'll include them in part 3.

The Articulate Bitch

Sharing the Love

"Love is dope." - Someone from Black Twitter

When you enter the realm of love in whichever capacity, it can be the most satisfying feeling. You have someone who you're on an emotional level with, which is rare these days.

As with most positive things in our lives, when things are good we want to share them with those around us. We make a little extra in our paychecks maybe we share a bottle of wine with our friends or pay for dinner. We find a great new restaurant we bring our friends to try it too. We learn something amazing we teach our homies too. Bottom line is, we want to share the awesomeness. But what about our adventures in love? Should we share or keep the dopeness to ourselves?

Well for one, you have to pick and choose your audience. Some people are just too miserable to share your joy with, period. They will feign interest in what you're saying and give half hearted responses. They don't care about anything that has ever made you happy, they want you to tell them how crappy you feel so they can tell you how much crappier they feel. Stay away from these people in life, not just love.

Never ever ever tell a bitter bitch about your man/boyfriend/him. This girl is going to do nothing but tell you how all men ain't shit and how he's gonna do you dirty and all the nice things he's doing now are just part of his game. This poor bitch need some dick so bad you wish you had one to fuck her with. Make it worse this bitch will do some snake shit like fuck your man then be on some "I told you he wasn't shit" shit after.

An untrustworthy bitch is another girl you don't wanna share your relationshiptual details with. She will smile in your face and act like she's so happy for you all while She's scheming on how to get what you've got. This is probably the worst type of bitch. Sometimes this female deserves being fought.

Never, don't ever, tell another dude about a guy you're talking to or dating. I don't even agree with telling dudes in the imaginary "friend zone" about your relationships. There are only a few dudes in any female's life who truly wish to see her happy with someone else, an actual guy friend (who probably would still hit), or perhaps a relative. These are still difficult to spot, knowing their intentions before you spill the beans is key.

Lastly, never over-share. Even those people who do truly want to see you happy and don't mind you telling them tales will grow tired of hearing every petty detail that made you smile today. Be considerate and understand that sharing involves listening as well.

The Articulate Bitch

Welcome to Smokerdom

Your guide to the strange world of Smokerdom ... If you smoke you just might be high reading this. I salute you cuz I'm high writing it.

1. Everything non flammable that is either washable or disposable is probably an ashtray at some point. IDGAF if u think it's gross because it's true. Bottles and empty pop cans are favorites because there's probably something left over to out your bogie or blunt if you drop it inside.

2. We probably have some form of air freshening routine. Opening windows and turning on fans, spraying SOMETHING (whether air freshener or perfume/cologne), perhaps lighting a candle or incense (for those hippy dippy types). Sploofs (a toilet paper roll stuffed with dryer sheets that you blow the smoke into) for the residential types.

3. Lighters are like a reluctant shared commodity because someone is always forgetting one, losing one, pocketing one, buying one and so forth. They just rotate. I've got two lighters from two separate people from two different occasions as we speak. *shrug* lighter leashes are smart but gay. Sorry. Lol

4. Don't ask if I'm high. You saw me smoke. Am I doing high nigga shit? Okayden.

5. Everything is a bong or pipe. Bottles of all kinds, cans, and even apples. Yes.

Don't judge the stoner.

The Articulate Bitch

I'm Not Crazy!

So my friends (pretty much just Trap) and I are always discussing how crazy we have or tend to act in relationships. Check out the lovely ms Cyn Santana in a video about being a crazy girlfriend...



Thing is about being a crazy girlfriend is that as crazy as you want to be, your pride may sometimes get in the way of those momentary lapses in sanity that remind him who he's fucking with.

Why be crazy? Simple. Niggaz love a crazy bitch. Why? Because a crazy bitch cares and has no problem showing it. I wasn't always convinced there was any benefit to being an insane girlfriend until my closest guy friends explained why they stayed with many of the women they complained so much about. My homies have had females bleach their clothes, show up to their side chick's job, ring down their phones, break their video game consoles, destroy their phones and do all sorts of things you would assume would be deal breakers and leave these women single and lonely. But no such thing occurred, and all these niggaz not only stayed with these women but loved them all the same or sometimes more because of how crazy they are.

A crazy girlfriend cares. You flirted with a chick on twitter and she instantly blew up your phone about it. You thought it was something small and harmless, she doesn't see it that way. What's worse? That she overreacted or if she had no reaction at all, but simply did the same with some twitter nigga?

What would you rather? A girl who acts like nothing you do matters at all, or a girl who shows that the things you do affect her? I wasn't always sure, but I do see the value in being with someone who shows how they feel when you fuck up, no matter how big or small.

I used to have no reaction to anything my boyfriends of the past would do. Honestly being crazy takes a lot out of you. It requires you being observant of everything your man does and having a reaction for it. Now, let's not take it to extremes and think that we can get away with doing any level of insane shit with just any man. NO. Your level of crazy has to be relative to how long you have been with him and how strongly y'all feel about each other. 2 weeks into relationship and you still pee with the door closed does not warrant you smashing his XBox into oblivion for him getting a text from a girl that says "Wuddup?". You splitting rent and finding an earring in your bed does (it actually warrants a bit more).

Also, don't think you're allowed to be crazy at every moment every day. That's bullshit. No one wants to deal with someone who is a ticking time bomb. That's how girls get slapped.

Balance is key as with anything. Only be crazy when crazy is needed. The rest of your time should be spent being happy and enjoying all the dopest parts of being  in a relationship with someone you genuinely care about.

The Articulate Bitch

Tatted Girl Problems

The life of a tattooed female is an exciting one fraught with peril and loaded with unsolicited comments and compliments alike. There's just a lot of shit only we deal with day to day. If you share my sentiment, thank you. If you don't, we'll hopefully you'll learn something today.

1. Touchy feely folks are one of my biggest annoyances. Last I checked, we humans see with our eyes. Why on earth do you need to snatch up my arm and run your hands over my skin to "see my tattoo"? It's not Braille and YOU are not blind. Don't touch me.

2. 21 Questions. People always have questions about tattoos, which is fine, but knowing which questions are appropriate seems to escape many people. Dumb questions are worse. Don't ask me if it hurt. Yes, it did. Don't ask me why I got it. I wanted it. Don't ask me "would I ever tattoo my face". Would you? Okay.

3. Curiosity Factor. A lot of dudes have been with girls who HAVE tattoos but haven't been with heavily inked women before. There's an assumption and curiosity that goes along with all this. Before you've said a word he's already decided that you're probably a freak and he's wondering what tattoos are hiding under your clothes. We get the corny pick up lines too "Can I lick your tattoos?" or "I wanna see the REST," being the most common and most annoying.

4. Niggaz also have this irritating habit of thinking that since you have tattoos already, they can make suggestions. Every single time I've been in the tattoo shop some nigga suggests or asks "you should tattoo my name,". The fuck? Why? You're not even PAYING for this tattoo. But that was real fuckin' cute though.

5. Non tatted girls either admire us for having the balls to be this inked, saying "I could never get away with that," or they hate us and think we've made a stupid decision. Those who admire look longingly at our skin as if there's something they've missed. Those who hate us make slick comments and screwface like we don't notice. I feel most sorry for those girls because they clearly don't realize how much we don't care.

6. Meeting mom is also a pretty real concern. White girls with tattoos tend to date white guys with tattoos so meeting his mom isn't much of a concern. Hence why I've said for years I can only date dudes with tattoos. But our darling black mothers are never too pleased to see a Nubian ink goddess walk through the door. At the very least, if her son is heavily tattooed she'll understand why he chose a tattooed girl. If he's bare-skinned, Houston, we have a problem.

7. Everyone thinks you do tattoos. Dude after tatted dude could pass by and no one would make that assumption. As a female, once you pass a certain point of coverage, it feels like everyone thinks you're a tattoo artist. I can barely draw stick people fam.

8. The feminine factor had me lost for a while. The makeup, the hello kitty obsession, the hair, the nails. Most ladies I know who are tattoo enthusiasts like myself fall into the culture (yes, it is one. We have magazines, websites and conventions dedicated to our community). The dramatic makeup and hair, the immaculate manicures and the strange obsession with Hello Kitty. I can't explain it. Thing is, we have to balance out the hardcore, pain-loving, badass image with something overtly feminine and beautiful. That's why my makeup is always done and my hair is too. Without those things I'd just be scary looking.

9. Planning for the future isn't always the main priority here. But as a female there are things I researched for my future ink. Mostly to do with having kids and what that will do to my tattoos. The whole lower back tattoo, epidural myth is just that. A myth. Problem is, that myth runs so deep even some doctors believe it (certainly not all). Definitely do the research yourself for peace of mind. Second was torso tattoos and pregnancy. I'm dying to tattoo my stomach but if it's gonna stretch during pregnancy and possibly not return to beauty afterward, I'd rather not do it. From what I've read it's a case by case situation. Some women recover flawlessly and some look terrible after. Again, do your own research.

10. People assume that because we have tattoos, we must love every dude who's got tattoos too. No. We might like their work, we probably find them more attractive than the average dude but having tatts alone isn't enough. It might get them a second look but there is no certainty we'll like them. Stupid stereotype.

Just a little insight. Hopefully you can relate or you learned something.

The Articulate Bitch

Moment of Honesty

I've told myself many times that I would write this post. It's been written and deleted, revised and edited, drafted and scrapped so many times. But I haven't spoken on this since... Well in a long time. It's going to be cryptic and poetic at times but bear with me. I really need to get this out.

Last year my ex, one of the true loves in my life took his own life. First hearing about it sent me into a very strange space. We didn't end on the best of terms so for a while I was numb. I couldn't feel anything. I didn't know how to feel. I didn't want to feel anything.

I've never lost someone so close to me since my cousin in 2003, and I've never lost someone the way I lost my ex. For a long time I couldn't cry about it, it didn't feel real. Then one random night when I had too much to drink and too much to smoke and was alone with my thoughts the wave I had missed hit me. I slid to the floor in my bathroom and balled like a baby for 30 minutes.

My body shook, my makeup ran into my eyes and blinded me. My heart felt like it exploded inside my chest. I had no idea I was that sad about it. Until that moment.

I wished he had known he could've talked to me. That I would have been there for him regardless of our history. I wished he wouldn't have felt so alone. I wished I could've been there to show him that his life was worth living.

I'm trippin' it been so long. I still think about him every so often. I remember him vividly and purely. I cringe recalling our fights, I smile recalling the good times.

Sometimes I'm angry. I sometimes feel that those around him were ignoring the signs, that they should've helped him. But I can't place blame in anyone for what happened.

He meant a lot to me. He lost himself somewhere no one could reach him. He isolated himself so deeply no one could bring him back to himself and the remarkable person he was.

I wish I would've known. Wish there was something I could've said to keep him here. Now all I can do is remember him. Sometimes it's the remembering that hurts the most.

Jamz

NWEE: Doing The Most

We all see it when it happens. We often yell profanities at our phones or roll our eyes in disapproval at the folks who are often repeat offenders of "doing the most".

1. Females always seem to want to declare that they're "tatted". I'm not trying to diss anyone in particular but in all honesty, everybody got tattoos now. Why certain females do the most to let people know they're tatted is beyond me. We can see a picture of you, having the word "tatted" in your name or announcing it in your bio is not the most necessary thing in the world. This is mostly applicable to the girls who barely have enough ink to be considered "tatted" in the first place. But whatever.

2. Dudes and the overly lonely tweets. I've got this one dude in particular on my timeline who is always tweeting how women don't know what they want, how he's a good man, how any girl would be lucky to have him etc. He goes on daily rants about the standards he has set for the woman he would make his lady. Tweets pictures desperately seeking approval, "ladies what do you think?" and thirst traps females with photos of himself with his daughter. I'm sure he's not the only guy who does this but half the time I don't know whether to laugh or feel bad for him.

3. Sad girl tweets are another thing which get borderline irritating. We're all entitled to our bad days, our moments of weakness and the need to express ourselves. I've had a couple sad girl days on twitter. However I vent mostly to get the thoughts out and resolve with myself. Some girls do it simply for the pity party they hope twitter will throw for them. They give us too much information or continue their rant just a bit too long to be taken seriously. We want to feel sorry for them but at some point we run out of sympathy when we see they're dragging out the issue and digging for consolation. Got an issue? Here's a tissue.

4. The man whore is another dude whose antics on the Internet tire us out. He's a never ending RTer of compliments from various females and cockiness which usually comes from being good looking or being the asshole women love. He gets away with being disrespectful and judgmental to females because for every one he is a total dick to, there are a hoard of others who swear the sun rises and sets with him. He's the guy who is always topless in his avi, loves to twitpic himself with his tongue out or pouty, carefully moisturized lips and bedroom eyes. He's overtly sexual but is rarely called thirsty because he nor the mindless women who love him think a good looking man can be considered such.

5. Bitter bitches get my last slot because they really ain't shit. These girls are the ones that are still salty about something that happened too long ago. They have no more reason to be upset and it they absolutely refuse to let the issue go. They complain for weeks and months, they subtweet and exhaust themselves trying to make the world as upset as they are. They literally are the misery seeking company on twitter. Can't blame them since they'll find plenty of like-minded folks to be mad with. Bravo. Twitter is your world you bored bitch.

The Articulate Bitch

The Dude Spectrum

So I'm sittin' here smoking an pondering on more than a few things that have been bothering me lately, which turned into me having an internal conversation with myself, which turned into me coming to a few conclusions, which turned into this blog post. I'm high so this may or may not be formal sounding like I normally do.

It's no secret there are different classes of females. Perhaps "class" isn't the right word, let's say "title" instead. We've all heard and read the titles different females hold in any particular dude's life: Main, side, fuck friend, home girl, ex girl etc. Well. That's cool, because it's 100% true. However, have you niggaz ever thought to yourself: "wait. If I gave her a title, what title do I hold?"

No. I bet you think only a hoe would put the men in her life in slots the way a man would. Well, welcome to the hell of 2012 gentlemen.

The first gentleman on the list is the fuck friend aka Dick On Demand. Pretty self explanatory by his title, the DOD is a rare thing amongst women. Most females aren't socially comfortable admitting they have a friend just for the purpose of sex. They want feelings and emotions and commitment and yadda yadda yadda. I get it, fucking someone who isn't your boyfriend is terrible and reprehensible and every woman who does it should be burned at the steak like the dick hungry heathen she is. Right? Okay then. Moving on.

Next we have the boyfriend. Ah, this gentleman is fantastic. He's in limbo between being a HIM and being a "hubby". We can also call this gentleman a "man". He's the dude you put the box on reserve for. He gets the best of you and hopefully he deserves it. He's the one you kiss on the lips, make breakfast for, giggle and hold hands in public with. Y'all haven't been together long enough to be in love but you're both highly smitten and infatuated with each other. He probably treats you awesome but may slip up from time to time, which is a sticky situation. See, y'all not in love so your position is not guaranteed if any one of these females presents him with something better. Boyfriends require the most work because you have to show them everyday why they should be with you. The relationship is still fragile.

Next we have the ex boyfriend you're not over. Oh, we hate this nigga the most. He thinks the sun shines out his ass. You still have deep feelings for him which either annoy they shot outta you or make you do stupid things you always end up regretting. The usual is the latter. For some reason these dudes are the hardest to let go of, mostly because they won't let you go either. Y'all may even still fuck, pretending it's just sex even though you're secretly still not done with them and hoping they'll decide to give it another go.

Who's next? We have the most notorious and most mysterious dude on any list: the HIM. A HIM is a dude who you show some favor to. He comes in many degrees of HIMness, ranging from a crush to a borderline boyfriend. One thing must be remembered about HIMs, they are so-called because they are anonymous. They can't be named because they can't be claimed. We share these HIMs. Until he holds a boyfriend or hubby title he is and should steadily be called HIM. He is called HIM: Her Imaginary Man. Either he's a fictitious man made up by a lonely female or a dude that just can't be claimed as yet. Either way never assume a HIM controls everything, he doesn't have that pull yet and perhaps never will depending on the progression of the relationship.

The home boy has it the hardest. He's the dude who has been friend zoned (if you believe in that). He's the shoulder to cry on, the faithful, platonic testosterone. Girls will deny it, but this dude is also the emergency dick. He's that dude on the bench who plays his position patiently waiting for when the starting lineup fucks up. He's very important though, because he will often give decent advice if he's not trying to fuck you on any given day.

The final and most highly acclaimed dude is the hubby, of course. He's the be all and end all of the men. He eliminates the need for all the other dudes on this list because he is every man in one. He's the home boy you fuck like the fuck friend, the HIM you can claim as you boyfriend/man. This is the dude you've put time in with, fought and done comfortable shit with. He's the dude that gets morning head and pays bills. He gets the presidential treatment. He's your king. This man is valued and cherished, loved and adored. He's the one you wake up and go to sleep thinking about or next to.

Every man holds his place and is valuable in his position, but the art is in knowing which man is worth which position. Don't confuse a HIM for a hubby or a home boy for a fuck friend. Crossing the wrong lines with the wrong dude will lead to confusion and heartbreak. So choose wisely.

So fellas... Which dude are you?

The Articulate Bitch

RIP My Mentions

So it happens all the time on twitter, someone does or says one thing or another, the wrong person (or right person depending on who you are) retweets it in disagreement and the flood gates open to mockery from all sides.

It's happened, now twice, to me and lord if you don't have a sense of humor or a tough skin the shit will eat you alive. Had this kind of forum for mass point-and-laugh been around before with the potential to spread as fast as twitter, my self esteem may have seen the end of me long ago.

Well once my mentions calmed the fuck down I had a chance to actually see what people were saying, and I was actually pretty appalled.

It started with a twitpic of my unfinished Hennessy tribute tattoo (I like Hennessy... A lot). Black twitter got ahold of it and believe me it was a sad wrap after that. Most people had comments I was prepared to read since the day I laid on the table for the two hours of meticulous work. I always knew there was a possibility for this to happen so honestly I wasn't surprised. You can't please everyone, and unless you know me personally, know my personality and know the context of the tattoo... Yeah it's a royally moronic thing to have on my skin forever. Absolutely.

However, beyond the banter I expected came some unnecessary comments in the form of personal attacks. I don't mind that some people think it was a stupid or ratchet tattoo to get, that's okay with me. But I lost count of the "kill yourself" tweets after 15. Seems like overkill if you ask me. But who am I? I drink Hennessy.

A lot of happiness comes from being able to laugh at yourself. I got this tattoo for the sake of the irony, for one, and because quite simply... I wanted it lol. I said to both my friend and my tattoo artist, " oh god they're going to roast me alive for this one," and I was right. But you know what? I still love my tattoo.

So for those who called me a stupid bitch or a ratchet hoe or whatever form of degradation you chose, I ask you; after reading this do I sound like an unintelligent female? Do I sound like someone who is ghetto-ridden for life with no chance of success based on what I choose to ink on my skin? If your answer is still yes, well there's also this....

I'm sorry I didn't have a tattoo of an ex boyfriend's name for you to praise and call me a ride-or-die for. Or a religious tattoo which in itself is an oxymoron. My bad I don't have prayer hands or rosary beads or a crucifix with "only god can judge me" declared above. I'm so sorry I didn't have a child with some nigga I'm tried to trap and tattooed their name on me. Sorry I'm not into (and I say this as a generalization) the classic "black girl" tattoos. I'm into originality and art (Shoutout the tatted white girls who know what that means). I'm a tattoo enthusiast. It's art based on passion. You only get tattooed what you love and what means something. I didn't do it to declare "I'm tatted" like many people do. Tattoos aren't meant to make you "cool" they're meant to show you're passionate about what's on your skin. Sorry, I'm preaching the gospel. Didn't mean to.

Sounds like I'm reacting lol I know. But for anyone who has had their mentions destroyed the way mine were (lol destroyed would be an understatement) just know you're not the first and you won't be the last Today for me, tomorrow for someone else.

Now I've gotta be great just to shut people up. Fantastic. *sigh* lol

The Articulate Bitch

Mawga Gyal

When my dear twitter homie @BUMBOCLAWT said she wanted to write a post about body image, I gladly offered a platform. I had no idea she would take this angle on it and after reading it I was so glad she did (clearly because I can relate). Big girls aren't the only ones with body issues. Let me introduce a perspective you may not have ever considered before; that of the "mawga gyal". Enjoy.





First and foremost, I will have you all know that I think the whole debate of beauty is bullshit. To me, anyone who’s confident, whether they have DD’s or A cup… a six pack or a bang belly is sexy.

If we all look back, I think the majority of us can agree that the whole idea of beauty has changed significantly throughout the past few decades. Back in the 90’s females just had to look… well… they just had to look natural, shit. Girls were even shaving their heads left, right and center and were still considered sexy. Now that’s only cool because Amber Rose brought it back. You didn’t need to have big breasts, or an ass that could be used as a floatation device. You could just be you, and being you was good enough.

But hey, welcome to the new world. Where you gotta have a flat stomach, big tits, a fat ass, and curly hair down your back to be considered “beautiful.”

I hear the debate of thick versus fat almost everyday since being thick is “in”. But watch out… because once you’re “fat” people will be lined up to tell you about yourself. Especially over the Internet.

Bigger girls often get slandered on a daily basis, which is sadly expected from our society. But with all this mix up and blem blem concerning bigger girls, people are forgetting there’s a whole other body type that gets it almost everyday.

Ladies and gentleman, I introduce you to the “skinny” girl or “mawga” gyal… if you will.

First of all, I hate the term “skinny” or “mawga”. Shit sounds like you haven’t eaten for weeks and your ribs could be played like a xylophone. The amount of times in my life I’ve heard: “How yuh suh mawga?... Yuh muss eat more” and “Oh my god, how are you so skinny, you eat so much?”… I could not even tell you. And slim girls, I know you feel my pain. People stay asking these “how are you so skinny” questions as if I have some type of answer for them.

Stressing the fact that someone has a small body frame is NOT a compliment. Neither is insisting that they need to eat more.

So… like bitch. Get the fuck out of here, please.

Have these comments had an affect on my self-esteem? Absolutely. A few years ago, a comment like that is all it would take to make me feel horrible about myself for the rest of the week, but I grew up. And through life experience, grew into a confident, strong woman.

Do these comments still bother me? Well… they definitely don’t affect my self-esteem, but are they annoying? HELL YES!

When people make comments about body weight or size, do they consider the fact that their comments aren’t going to add 5lbs to my thighs? Calling me skinny isn’t going to give me a fatter ass or bigger breasts. So what’s the point?

At the end of the day, guess what? We live in a DIVERSE world. People come in all shapes and sizes and none is more attractive than another. So grow up.

It’s taken a while, but I love myself… everything about myself. From my body to my personality. Of course I still have my days from time to time where I feel ugly or feel gross but that’s life. At the end of the day I’m confident with myself. And no matter my size, or if I lose weight randomly or gain five pounds from that Big Mac combo … guess what? I am beautiful.

So to all my slim chicks out there, first things first. You have got to be able to look in the mirror find yourself beautiful. You have to be confident in your own skin. Don’t only EMBRACE your small frame but LOVE it. Next thing, if someone doesn’t love you for each and every inch of tininess on your body then let them know that they always have the option to turn their face the other way.

Sounds cliché to say, but I don’t give a fuck cause its true. If one person doesn’t find you beautiful, then someone else will.

Oh, and to all of you who continuously make the “oh she’s so mawga” comments. You know what you do when you see a slim chick? You get the fuck over it and move on with your day.

Unless someone you care about has a serious problem with their weight, and your commentary will ultimately have a positive effect on their life… then girl, bye.

And that’s just what the fuck it is,
BUMBOCLAWT

Louis Belt: No Bus Fare

Ladies, you ever fuck with a nigga and don't find out he's a bum until its too late? Well here is yet another embarrassing story from my vaults. Enjoy, and don't judge me. I'm doing better, I promise.

So when I was in high school and light skin niggaz were poppin', I used to talk to this real cute light skin nigga. I'm talkin' real crush like. He played me to the left a couple times so I stopped fuckin' with him.

Years later we randomly meet up in the old hood (I was having a cute day, trust me) and he got this stuck on stupid face lookin' at me, talmbout "you look so different than I remember. You still look good though blah blah blah,".

So, remembering how he played me before, I was in no rush to end up in the same situation as before. Not to mention I wasn't feelin' light skin niggaz at all the second time around. But not wanting to miss out on something that was possibly meant to be, I entertained a little chitter chatter.

Before I get into the real shit, know this: nigga had a job and a vehicle, yeah he still lived at home but 2 outta 3 ain't bad.

So one day he comes to check me. Takes me out, nothing hectic we killed 2 pounds of wings and a couple beers. So I roll a blunt (my crib, my blunt, my weed) we smoke, it's getting late so y'all know where my head is at.

Wam bam thank you ma'am, dick was great and I'm back to smokin', naked in my sheets bumpin' Diplomatic Immunity. It's Thursday and I'm expecting Trap back home any minute so we can head to Wetbar. I look over and notice this nigga is hella comfortable smokin' my spliff n shit.

Trap calls me tellin' me she's on her way home, I say "cool, I'll see you soon," and make it mad obvious I got places to go that night. Nigga still chillin'. I'm thinkin' "whatever, he'll probably leave when I'm leaving, worst case scenario,".

I hop in the shower, then hop out. This nigga still chillin'. Now I'm thinking this nigga wanna stay over, and trust me that was NOT happening so I ask him. Where he parked. He tells me he didn't drive. Cool. I live downtown, lots of people prefer to park at a subway and take the train into the city. No prob. But then, he asks me, straight faced, looking me in my eyes: "So yo, can you send me some bus fare?"

....

....

....

Yeah. Nigga was sittin' on my bed in wearin' a goddamn Louis Vuitton belt and had the NERVE.... Lemme stop.

I swear to you, I didn't know what to do it say. I wanted to laugh, screwface, cuss him out... All kinds. So me, being the asshole I am, I tell him I can't help him. Knowing damn well I have about 2 bills in my purse. I sat there and watched him sweat tryin' to figure out how he was gettin' home.

Got dressed, did my makeup, did my hair, Trap walks in (I had already texted her the story) and she jumps in the shower. So not wanting to keep this dude in my crib any longer I hand him a five without even a hint of a smile and show him to the door.

Yup. Cry for him.

The Articulate Bitch

Trust Issues: Loyalty is Dead

In the past year when discussing the triumphs of recently successful people, I found much emphasis on the concept of strength in numbers. Whether we're talking about having a team of supportive folks urging you forward to new heights, or a squad working with you to realize your goals, or having just one partner to hold you down as you conquer your world on your own, loyalty is always held in high esteem. Or... At least it once was.

Let's be real, how many of us can claim to be loyal? Oh, all of y'all, huh? What about when your loyalty is tested? Will you uphold or crumble?

Relationship loyalty is generally a no-brainer of sorts. Most think being faithful is the extent of loyalty. Yeah, that's real cute. Loyalty goes far beyond committing your fuck parts to one person. Loyalty is in the trials, the tribulations, the shouting matches and tears. Loyalty is in the tests and stress of a relationship. I saw it quoted that a woman's loyalty is tested when a man has nothing and a man's loyalty is tested when he has everything. It's easy to be loyal when you are getting everything you've ever wanted, or when the best thing in your life is already yours. But when the struggle is real, or when temptation is in abundance, your loyalty is not only tested but comes into question. Most people can not handle their loyalty being tested, so they give in, they falter, they slip. Often times there is no way to recover.

Team loyalty is often the strongest because it relies on the strength of many to be strong. It is based upon a group having the same desires and motives to reach individual and collective goals. Rappers are a perfect example of this. Every rapper has a crew behind him (with the exception of very few such as Nipsy Hustle). TDE, ASAP, MMG, YMCMB, OVO, XO, Taylor Gang, Coke Boys, G Unit, Rocafella, Dipset, DBlock, Wu Tang Klan etc.. Seeking strength in numbers is no mere coincidence in the music industry. An industry with a reputation for bringing out the most deplorable, back-stabbing, fugayzi behavior out of otherwise genuine, upstanding and real people. Seeing disloyal behavior in these groups is depressing. Why? Because we hold them in high esteem hoping they will be the examples we want them to be. They're constantly in view so we secretly hope they show us that loyalty is not a façade. Instead the end up being the example of how friendships, business partners and alliances get fucked up.

Friendship loyalty has become nothing more than an urban legend. A naive myth we believe in because we are taught to. Females have to worst time with this it seems. I don't know a single female who hasn't said "I don't like/fuck with/have girl friends". It's a sad thing but nonetheless a reality of the times. I'm not even sure how to expand on this. Truth is, and believe me I've reflected deeply on this, of all the friendships I've had and lost, I can't say I was responsible for the demise of any (I have a post dedicated to these friendships so stay tuned). But what I will say is that from an outside perspective on many other friendships, jealousy is usually the cause of a betrayal proving their disloyalty. With females it's usually a nigga who sets in motion a chain of events that sends the already fragile dynamic crumbling. In the end girls always say "I'm not even fighting over him," which may be true, but the rift started because of him so ether way, you take the L.

Yet still, there are those who feel loyalty is OWED to them. Never. Loyalty is like respect and money, it is worked for and earned. No one owes you loyalty without you first deserving it.

The Articulate Bitch

The Return of Club Chronicles

Back like cooked crack!!!! Fuck this! I miss telling y'all all the bullshit I see in the club. I miss sharing the experience with you and most of all I miss laughing while I write these things. So club chronicles back. Don't get caught slippin' cuz I'm gon' blooogggg you I'm gon' blooogggg you. Okay okay... Fuego.

I wanna make this the Halloween edition but since a lot of this applies on a regular club night ....

Ladies... Why are we still having this conversation? WEAR YOUR FUCKING SIZE! I saw all chunky everything last night. Chunky "sexy" cat woman, chunky "sexy" fairy, chunky "sexy" angel, chunky "sexy" chola.... No. Stop this. I know every female wants to be something "sexy" or "slutty" for halloween but for one, that shit has been done to death and two that shit doesn't come in your size. So cut it out. You don't look good and your friends are evil for making you think otherwise.

***We interrupt this post for an awkward moment***

That awkward moment a clique of seven girls walks in... And they're ALL the ugly friend. Yeah. I'm sad.

***...Back to our regular scheduled fuck shit***

Fellas, y'all gotta learn to respect the curve. I'm jumping around on the couch at Church and one of my niggaz homie decides to invade my sacred couch space to try and catch a bubble from the kid. Real shit homie musta grabbed my waist five times, getting curved each and every time. Plus my nigga was warning him to fall binack and in my nigga's own words he "doesn't fuckin' listen" because he was pressing' me like a space bar, word to Nicki. Ayo, I'm not trying to be coy or cute or play hard to get when I give niggaz the curve. I'm not interested, I don't dance with niggaz, and don't you ever... eva eva eeeeva... eva eva eeeeva.... Invade my couch space. There are plenty of females loose off that goose who will dance with you ON THE DANCEFLOOR. Basically... Fuck off.

Although my Molly poppin' days are done, it's obviously very popular amongst club folks. Many times with the females who don't party often and wanna "just have fun" for one night. I find 8 times outta 10 though, it's dudes offering girls Molly. So let me address those dudes right quick: stop giving ugly girls Ms. A hot girl looks happy and sexy (most times) if she's rolling. An ugly bitch on one makes you wanna dig out both eyes with a spoon on some Houston shit, and throw up on yourself. It's so unattractive. I mean, they already are, but let's not add fuel to the fire. They get amped and hyper and attract the wrong attention. Stop making these girls the laughing stock of the party. That's not nice.

Drink choice is just that, a choice. We drink Hennessy because it's a better drunk than Grey Goose. I tweet about it so much Hennessy should be cutting me a check (for the record there is currently a Hennessy shortage in Toronto... We go hard). More than a few people have told me they either tried or switched to Hennessy because of how much we praise it. That being said, don't go copying us then mixing with other liquors all night, then wanna blame the Hennessy. No. Hennessy didn't make you face plant on the sidewalk in the club district or vomit on the curb and lose your shoe. Your drunk liquor gluttonous self did. You know why you don't hear us complain about it? Why we still swear by it? Why we drink up to 6 bottles a weekend of it? Because we appreciate loyalty. We don't fuck with other alcohol so we don't get FUCKED by other alcohol the way y'all mixin' folks do. Whatever....choose as you please but don't blame #teamhennessy for a damn thing. We skraight.

The Articulate Bitch

New Music: Georgia Boys

Gotta love having dope friends from south of the border. Y'all know what it's like to have some dope music drop into your lap that most people haven't heard yet, you go HAM trynna put everyone else on. I'm bout to switch up and revamp your whole iTunes game with these three new Atlanta acts. I predict a blow up in the next 10 months ( kinda like I predicted with The Weeknd.. ahem... Yeah, I'm tooting my own horn *pause*). Soon you won't be able to make a move without hearing from these artists, so get to downloading!

First up is an artist I was first introduced to a couple years ago. Money Makin' Nique (also a member of Two9, but I'll get to that shortly) been doing this music thing for quite some time now. I gotta say as much as I love his voice and flow on these tracks, his production choice is what always blows me away. That distinctive ATL bounce is all over his mixtape. Check out the video for his recent single F.A.X Machine, featuring plenty of nudity and prometh inspired visuals. If you just had a breakup, this is definitely right up your alley....



Be sure to download the mixtape Gas Money and get your playlist game right.

Next we have an artist you may have already heard whispers of. Trinidad James is a Trini born Atlien with a serious gold fettish and a southern drawl you can't help but love hearing float over these bass driven beats. I'm head over heels in love with his single "All Gold Everything". It's on my "Getting Ready for the Club" playlist. Add it to yours and check out the DOPE video for the song....



Download the mix tape Don't Be S.A.F.E. HERE

Last but most certainly not least is the mega music group Two 9. Boasting a collection of collabos from Atlanta's best up and coming artists, Two 9's mixtape Two 9 Forever is a buffet of southern bounce. Not convinced yet? How about production/ Collabo credits from the likes of Juicy J, Meek Mill, Fly Union,  Lil B, A$AP Rocky and Kreayshawn? Cosigns are cool and all but their music really does speak for itself. Check the ratchetly dope video for Scottie 2 Hottie me and Trap have been rockin' to since we got put on. PASS THE AMMO!!!

Get your click on and download the MIXTAPE pronto fam.

Follow all these artists on twitter and get familiar... the buzz is crazy.

@DJOSH_KOSH  @ThatBoyCurtis @FATMANKEY @Daaaamien @RetroSushi @FAT_KIDS_BROTHA @WavyWallace @MoneyMakinNique @TheCoolIsMac @PjTheHero @GunnerSellWhite @TrinidadJamesGG

The Articulate Bitch

NWEE: Subtweet Life

I began this post quite a while ago but neglected completing it for fear of it sounding self-important. But the more time passed, the more I added and revised it, the more true it became for not only myself, but so many more people.

Now, the word "hater" is definitely in the top three most overused and misused words to grace our vocabulary. Overused mostly by the misusers. So let's begin by giving this word a concrete definition.

Hater - someone who responds negatively to a person they envy in some way, shape or form.

Simply disliking someone or something does not make a person a hater. Why? Because we can't all like everything. For example, I don't like lace fronts. Am I hating on girls that wear lace fronts? No, because hate implies envy, and really, what is there to be envious of? Exactly.

Why do females always make some outta pocket comment on some shit that really don't concern them and make it personal? If you gon' make a general statement by all means generalize away. But don't get specific then equate your bullshit comments about ONE person (ie subtweets) with a shared observation. For example: I sometimes say things about baby mothers. I already know it doesn't apply to ALL of them, and it doesn't apply to just ONE of them either. My statement is therefore GENERAL and not directed to just ONE angry bitch. But if you're speaking on something, strategically leaving out the name of the person, then referring to specific examples guess what? That, my friend, is a subtweet.

So, question: when y'all tweet hateful shit about people like it's funny, what reaction are you hoping for or expecting? You want a twitter confrontation? The back and forth banter usually started by the first person to grow balls and throw in an @ name. Subtweets? Where your opponent stoops to your level and rants aimlessly to their followers about some unnamed LAME. Real life confrontation? Are you expecting them to turn on their location so you can make the ahit real? Or do you just want them to feel bad and cry? I don't know who would, but some people are just fragile.

Better yet... The fuck u gon' do when u get NO reaction? You just wasted valuable TL slots to talk shit about someone who won't even give you the time of day. You dedicated tweet after tweet to them and they wouldn't give you even 140 characters. Thankfully you have me, to give you an entire blog post of shine. Heeeey! *waves*

I hope y'all get carpel tunnel from subtweeting niggaz.

The Articulate Bitch

Wicked Games

Remember when no one knew who The Weeknd was or what he looked like? We heard the voice and had no face to picture while our pupils dialated and teeth grinded while playing song after song. Those days are long gone, Toronto's favourite drug induced R&B crooner isn't hiding a damn thing anymore. We know the voice, we know the name, we've been to the shows, and out from the shadows we know the face. Let's play a game........

The Articulate Bitch

HEADLINERS

Headliners.

A city brimming with talent and a lust for life. Nights filled with music, culture and a pulse that sets the tempo for todays popular culture. The worlds eyes are keenly focussed on Toronto and how we do what we do. Headliners places focus on the beauty of night life and the beauties that live in it. This is the inspired life.

Chapter 01.

#headliners

Shane Stirling / Co. | Headliners | The Inspired Life. from Shane Stirling on Vimeo.

October's hottest party is this Friday at Time Nightclub in Toronto....

Come witness the art of celebration.

The Articulate Bitch

Only In Toronto

The city of Townsville....

Nah, it's Toronto. Screwface capital of the world. Land of pump fakes and real talent. I've lived here all my life and I love it love it love it, even when it drives me crazy.

Sometimes I say things around folks from other places forgetting they can't relate to the same things us Torontonians can. This city has a culture all to itself that is both amazing and terrifying at times. If you're from here, you'll nod in agreement and if you're not, well here's some education for your next trip to my city.

Only in Toronto, do you have an argument amongst your friends about which Chinese restaurant to eat at after the club. "New Ho King!" "No! Garden!" "Fuck garden! Hong Shing!" (cue the random Scarborough friend) "Well, I want Perfect's". Yep, it's all Chinese, and yep, this argument is totally valid because each spot makes something the other ones don't make as good. The constant battle. Never ends.

Only in Toronto has Wetbar replaced Thursday on the calendar. Whether you love it or hate it, everybody knows where the party is on a Thursday night. Folks who haven't experienced it at its best always talk down on it, but for those of us who have enjoyed the wild and awesome Thursday nights there, there is literally nowhere else you'd rather be.

Only in Toronto are promoters, DJs/MCs, club goers and strippers the only celebrities. Why? Well because other than Drake and Melanie Fiona who else is recognizable? Exactly.

Only in Toronto do you prepare yourself to be yelled at by the old dude outside Forever 21 at Yonge and Dundas to "Believe in the lord" right before you cross the street and see the Eaton Centre pimp dressed head to toe in a 3 piece suit complete with gators and a matching fedora, carrying his cane and bible.

Only in Toronto are you certain to see at least one Degrassi star, comedian from Video on Trial, cast member from 1 Girl 5 Gays or Much Music host if you spend enough time hangin' out downtown. It's kinda cool actually. They all live, work and play in the city, and from my experience they're all very humble and approachable.

Only in Toronto has every lightskin model girl had sex with the same lightskin rapper nig..... Never mind.

Only in Toronto do you have to leave 15 minutes early for anything if you plan on takin' public transit. TTC always got some sort of delay going on slowing down the entire movement o your day. Detours, shuttle buses, emergencies at track level... It's always some form of fuckery.

Only in Toronto do folks have a favourite street meat truck outside city hall. That blue truck poutine is the shit!

Only in Toronto do you see badder females in the club than in the strip club.

Only in Toronto is the entertainment industry network so small, that making even one enemy in the wrong circle can black ball your career. Sad, yes. However, true nonetheless. I've watched it happen, on a couple occasions. It's pretty disturbing and disappointing. But certain people just don't want to see others flourish. It's a TDot thing.

Only in Toronto do we have some of the BADDEST females and the CORNIEST niggaz. The shit almost makes no sense. Beautiful girl after beautiful girl has no choice but to settle for some pump faking, no game having, unimportant dude within the city, or have a long distance relationship with a dude south of the border. It's sad and highly unfortunate for the ladies because it's like you have to settle if you want to settle down.

I know there are plenty more noteworthy points about the screwface capital. Leave your "only in Toronto" notes in the comments!

The Articulate Bitch

Nothing's Wrong Except Everything: I Got Questions

Couple things I just keep wondering about. This shit is recurring and annoying as fuck. I just want answers brah.

1. You're not a model, artist, stylist, photographer etc. You have no occupation anywhere within the entertainment industry. So explain to me why you keep doing photoshoots. Why you taking up valuable photographer time, space and resources to have pictures taken of you? Photoshoots serve a few purposes, but the main purpose is for promotion. To add to a photographer or model's portfolio, to use the photos on websites, to promote an event or to be used in various media venues. By default your photo is used in the photographer' portfolio, but if those pics serve no personal purpose why y'all keep wasting time? Instagram? Really hoe?

2. Why does everyone's child have their own instagram page? Granted, this really only applies to a few people. Many folks are trying to get their children into modeling, or their mother(most often) is a stylist and takes the opportunity to showcase their abilities with their own child. In those instances, the page is justified. But some of y'all ain't even got cute or well-dressed kids and still got 369 pics of your kid being basic. Get it together.

3. Why dudes always taking pics of their outfits laid out on the bed for instagram? I LOVE a well dressed man, perhaps more than the average chick, and I can certainly appreciate a dude who knows how to put himself together. Nearly every weekend though, before the party, these dudes take to their closets and very strategically lay their clothes out to show instagram what they're wearing that night. I'm not calling these dudes homo but the pics be real frankie brah. Take a mirror pic, or a waist down photo like the cool cats do. Face it, the outfit ain't even that special. You got on a damn tee shirt, a designer belt an some Jordans. If your whole point was "Hey, look! My J's match my t shirt," we got the point. Now chill out and give the shit a rest.

.... These are rhetorical.

The Articulate Bitch

Top 5 Most Swag: Toronto Trill White Girls

Initially when I thought of this post I intended to have ten beautiful and stylish white girls, from all over, but so many of the lovely ladies were from my fair city I decided to shine the spotlight on them alone.

 Valentina

"Lady V"

 



 

 Co-Owner: TSOQ (719 Queen St West)

Boutique chic

@TheStoreOnQueen (twitter)

 



 

 

Megan Wilson

"Baller Boo"

 

sportswear meets high fashion

@shegotgame(twitter & instagram)

 



 

 

Jaclyn G.

"Jac Le Flash"

 

 

Jaclyn Genovese

Owner: Jac Flash (1036 Queen St West)

Queen Street Classy

@jaclyngenovese (instagram)

 



 

 

Dash

"The Russian Princess"

 

Prada Dee

Style Icon

Versatile vixen x Nail Game Crazy

@thehighesheels(Instagram)

 



 

 

C.Dub

"Da Boss"

 

Bossy Girl

Stylist Extrodinnaire

Fashion Forward casual swagger

@cdubdaboss (instagram)

 



 

all photos courtesy of respected instagram/tumblr pages

 

There you have it, 5 beautiful, talented and trill as fuck white girls. It should come as no surprise this city is brimming with beauties like these with style, class and enviable presence. Check them out on the social networks and show some love.... but keep the thirst to a minimum.

 

The Articulate Bitch



Kush Talk w/ Jamz

So I kinda went in yesterday cuz of some blatant identity theft on behalf of my style. Mind you, that very morning I had had a conversation with a Handsome guy about swagger jackery of all kinds.

Nearly everyone who is even relatively successful within my social circle is the embodiment of real. Whether they're selectively real - given a set of circumstances - or all the way real aka three hunna. They are the reason I created Truuism. Truuuism was not meant to be a religion, it's more along the lines of Buddhism, a way of life. The people I choose to surround myself with are disciples of that belief. They all KNOW THEMSELVES.

I was told not to dislike the un-creative, since clearly they're just following leaders. But on a lighter note I just wonder how it feels to son yourself by blatantly swagger jacking. You do realize people notice, don't you? You really wanna be the subject of an embarrassing picstitch showing what a biter you are? That's cool witchu? At least dilute it so it's not so obvious. Or is that asking too much? My bad. I'll just go.

#KsVomit tho.

The Articulate Bitch

Black Girls On Trial

Damn right I'm judging. I'm diving right the fuck into this post.

Clearly, as you can see, I am a black girl. My mother is quite on the afrocentric side, natural hair, organic materials, cowry shells, etc. Growing up, both my parents instilled a sense of black pride that I think many children lacked at that age. All my dolls were black. My Barbies were black, my fairy tale books had black princesses and black prince charmings and I even had a black children's Bible. I went to black focus tutor groups and after school programs. I had natural hair or braids all the way up to junior high school and didn't learn about weave until high school (blame brampton). Up until high school I only had a few black female friends. We were scarce in my neighborhood, which was super diverse (I grew up knowing about so many other cultures which was a blessing, trust me).

Then BOOM culture shock when I moved to Brampton with my dad and his wife. I had never seen so many niggaz in my life. Plus I met a whole new breed of female: the stereotypical black girl. The weave wearing, long fake nail having, loud talking, no manners having type black girl. The only place I had seen girls like these was visiting my mother in Florida (Broward & Dade county, wuddup) but this Canadianized version was something new.

For a while I just tried to fit in with them. Then I discovered that just wasn't me, and I found myself. But while in that world and experiencing that life I learned a lot. Some things I liked, but most things I REALLY didn't. Clearly, I'm not speaking about EVERY black girl. Sadly, I'm speaking about MANY of them. I like lists. So here's the run down:

1. Blame game - nothing is ever their fault. They always want to blame shit on some factor they can't control. "It's because I'm black!" or something similar. Never taking responsibility. It's pathetic.

2. PDA - Public displays of aggression are classic black girl behavior. Someone looks at them wrong, it's a fucking SCENE. They carry on so outlandishly it's embarrassing to watch in all honesty. Why? Well because right away I'm getting the same glares this ratchet chick is, just because we share similar skin tones.

3. Stare down - black girls are totally compelled to take a look at the next black girl. This wouldn't be a problem if they were innocent glances accompanied by a smile, but they're looks of disapproval nearly always followed by some rude comment just out of earshot.

4. Keeping up appearances - I can't tell anyone how to dress. I didn't buy your clothes so that's totally on you. But just know that how you look is often how you will be treated. Is it right? No, but you can't complain about being judged if all you do is judge. Stop getting your panties in a bunch and getting rowdy in public when people are staring at you in your hot pink lacefront, and Keylolo-esque demeanor. You look like a circus act so yeah... They're waiting for you to do a trick.

5. Cock fight - black girls are the reigning queens of fighting over men. SHUTTUP! JUST SHUTTUP 'CAUSE YOU KNOW IT'S TRUE! We act like total fools for the sake of some nigga who is fucking both (or all) of the girls carrying on stupid over him. We call the other girl, throw subs on the internet, walk out pon a gyal or whatever those girls say. It's deplorable behavior that it seems we ebony queens excel at.

As fantastic and beautiful as we are, why do we stay losing? Everyday some sad example for a black woman sets us back with a display of embarrassment. We're known for the best and absolute worst things. We hate each other so much, and sometimes I can't even disagree with the reasons why. We a hot ass mess sometimes. We really need to get it together.

I don't expect everyone to agree with me. All you preachy people are sitting there spewing shit about self-love and blah blah. That's fine and dandy. I happen to agree with you, but I also happen to live in the real world. Where light skin girls are fantasy, dark skin girls wear platinum blonde wigs, fat girls call themselves thick and every other black girl is your secret enemy. So stick that in your fro and pick it.

The Articulate Bitch