Ladies, you ever fuck with a nigga and don't find out he's a bum until its too late? Well here is yet another embarrassing story from my vaults. Enjoy, and don't judge me. I'm doing better, I promise.
So when I was in high school and light skin niggaz were poppin', I used to talk to this real cute light skin nigga. I'm talkin' real crush like. He played me to the left a couple times so I stopped fuckin' with him.
Years later we randomly meet up in the old hood (I was having a cute day, trust me) and he got this stuck on stupid face lookin' at me, talmbout "you look so different than I remember. You still look good though blah blah blah,".
So, remembering how he played me before, I was in no rush to end up in the same situation as before. Not to mention I wasn't feelin' light skin niggaz at all the second time around. But not wanting to miss out on something that was possibly meant to be, I entertained a little chitter chatter.
Before I get into the real shit, know this: nigga had a job and a vehicle, yeah he still lived at home but 2 outta 3 ain't bad.
So one day he comes to check me. Takes me out, nothing hectic we killed 2 pounds of wings and a couple beers. So I roll a blunt (my crib, my blunt, my weed) we smoke, it's getting late so y'all know where my head is at.
Wam bam thank you ma'am, dick was great and I'm back to smokin', naked in my sheets bumpin' Diplomatic Immunity. It's Thursday and I'm expecting Trap back home any minute so we can head to Wetbar. I look over and notice this nigga is hella comfortable smokin' my spliff n shit.
Trap calls me tellin' me she's on her way home, I say "cool, I'll see you soon," and make it mad obvious I got places to go that night. Nigga still chillin'. I'm thinkin' "whatever, he'll probably leave when I'm leaving, worst case scenario,".
I hop in the shower, then hop out. This nigga still chillin'. Now I'm thinking this nigga wanna stay over, and trust me that was NOT happening so I ask him. Where he parked. He tells me he didn't drive. Cool. I live downtown, lots of people prefer to park at a subway and take the train into the city. No prob. But then, he asks me, straight faced, looking me in my eyes: "So yo, can you send me some bus fare?"
....
....
....
Yeah. Nigga was sittin' on my bed in wearin' a goddamn Louis Vuitton belt and had the NERVE.... Lemme stop.
I swear to you, I didn't know what to do it say. I wanted to laugh, screwface, cuss him out... All kinds. So me, being the asshole I am, I tell him I can't help him. Knowing damn well I have about 2 bills in my purse. I sat there and watched him sweat tryin' to figure out how he was gettin' home.
Got dressed, did my makeup, did my hair, Trap walks in (I had already texted her the story) and she jumps in the shower. So not wanting to keep this dude in my crib any longer I hand him a five without even a hint of a smile and show him to the door.
Yup. Cry for him.
The Articulate Bitch
Saturday, 10 November 2012
Trust Issues: Loyalty is Dead
In the past year when discussing the triumphs of recently successful people, I found much emphasis on the concept of strength in numbers. Whether we're talking about having a team of supportive folks urging you forward to new heights, or a squad working with you to realize your goals, or having just one partner to hold you down as you conquer your world on your own, loyalty is always held in high esteem. Or... At least it once was.
Let's be real, how many of us can claim to be loyal? Oh, all of y'all, huh? What about when your loyalty is tested? Will you uphold or crumble?
Relationship loyalty is generally a no-brainer of sorts. Most think being faithful is the extent of loyalty. Yeah, that's real cute. Loyalty goes far beyond committing your fuck parts to one person. Loyalty is in the trials, the tribulations, the shouting matches and tears. Loyalty is in the tests and stress of a relationship. I saw it quoted that a woman's loyalty is tested when a man has nothing and a man's loyalty is tested when he has everything. It's easy to be loyal when you are getting everything you've ever wanted, or when the best thing in your life is already yours. But when the struggle is real, or when temptation is in abundance, your loyalty is not only tested but comes into question. Most people can not handle their loyalty being tested, so they give in, they falter, they slip. Often times there is no way to recover.
Team loyalty is often the strongest because it relies on the strength of many to be strong. It is based upon a group having the same desires and motives to reach individual and collective goals. Rappers are a perfect example of this. Every rapper has a crew behind him (with the exception of very few such as Nipsy Hustle). TDE, ASAP, MMG, YMCMB, OVO, XO, Taylor Gang, Coke Boys, G Unit, Rocafella, Dipset, DBlock, Wu Tang Klan etc.. Seeking strength in numbers is no mere coincidence in the music industry. An industry with a reputation for bringing out the most deplorable, back-stabbing, fugayzi behavior out of otherwise genuine, upstanding and real people. Seeing disloyal behavior in these groups is depressing. Why? Because we hold them in high esteem hoping they will be the examples we want them to be. They're constantly in view so we secretly hope they show us that loyalty is not a façade. Instead the end up being the example of how friendships, business partners and alliances get fucked up.
Friendship loyalty has become nothing more than an urban legend. A naive myth we believe in because we are taught to. Females have to worst time with this it seems. I don't know a single female who hasn't said "I don't like/fuck with/have girl friends". It's a sad thing but nonetheless a reality of the times. I'm not even sure how to expand on this. Truth is, and believe me I've reflected deeply on this, of all the friendships I've had and lost, I can't say I was responsible for the demise of any (I have a post dedicated to these friendships so stay tuned). But what I will say is that from an outside perspective on many other friendships, jealousy is usually the cause of a betrayal proving their disloyalty. With females it's usually a nigga who sets in motion a chain of events that sends the already fragile dynamic crumbling. In the end girls always say "I'm not even fighting over him," which may be true, but the rift started because of him so ether way, you take the L.
Yet still, there are those who feel loyalty is OWED to them. Never. Loyalty is like respect and money, it is worked for and earned. No one owes you loyalty without you first deserving it.
The Articulate Bitch
Let's be real, how many of us can claim to be loyal? Oh, all of y'all, huh? What about when your loyalty is tested? Will you uphold or crumble?
Relationship loyalty is generally a no-brainer of sorts. Most think being faithful is the extent of loyalty. Yeah, that's real cute. Loyalty goes far beyond committing your fuck parts to one person. Loyalty is in the trials, the tribulations, the shouting matches and tears. Loyalty is in the tests and stress of a relationship. I saw it quoted that a woman's loyalty is tested when a man has nothing and a man's loyalty is tested when he has everything. It's easy to be loyal when you are getting everything you've ever wanted, or when the best thing in your life is already yours. But when the struggle is real, or when temptation is in abundance, your loyalty is not only tested but comes into question. Most people can not handle their loyalty being tested, so they give in, they falter, they slip. Often times there is no way to recover.
Team loyalty is often the strongest because it relies on the strength of many to be strong. It is based upon a group having the same desires and motives to reach individual and collective goals. Rappers are a perfect example of this. Every rapper has a crew behind him (with the exception of very few such as Nipsy Hustle). TDE, ASAP, MMG, YMCMB, OVO, XO, Taylor Gang, Coke Boys, G Unit, Rocafella, Dipset, DBlock, Wu Tang Klan etc.. Seeking strength in numbers is no mere coincidence in the music industry. An industry with a reputation for bringing out the most deplorable, back-stabbing, fugayzi behavior out of otherwise genuine, upstanding and real people. Seeing disloyal behavior in these groups is depressing. Why? Because we hold them in high esteem hoping they will be the examples we want them to be. They're constantly in view so we secretly hope they show us that loyalty is not a façade. Instead the end up being the example of how friendships, business partners and alliances get fucked up.
Friendship loyalty has become nothing more than an urban legend. A naive myth we believe in because we are taught to. Females have to worst time with this it seems. I don't know a single female who hasn't said "I don't like/fuck with/have girl friends". It's a sad thing but nonetheless a reality of the times. I'm not even sure how to expand on this. Truth is, and believe me I've reflected deeply on this, of all the friendships I've had and lost, I can't say I was responsible for the demise of any (I have a post dedicated to these friendships so stay tuned). But what I will say is that from an outside perspective on many other friendships, jealousy is usually the cause of a betrayal proving their disloyalty. With females it's usually a nigga who sets in motion a chain of events that sends the already fragile dynamic crumbling. In the end girls always say "I'm not even fighting over him," which may be true, but the rift started because of him so ether way, you take the L.
Yet still, there are those who feel loyalty is OWED to them. Never. Loyalty is like respect and money, it is worked for and earned. No one owes you loyalty without you first deserving it.
The Articulate Bitch
Saturday, 27 October 2012
The Return of Club Chronicles
Back like cooked crack!!!! Fuck this! I miss telling y'all all the bullshit I see in the club. I miss sharing the experience with you and most of all I miss laughing while I write these things. So club chronicles back. Don't get caught slippin' cuz I'm gon' blooogggg you I'm gon' blooogggg you. Okay okay... Fuego.
I wanna make this the Halloween edition but since a lot of this applies on a regular club night ....
Ladies... Why are we still having this conversation? WEAR YOUR FUCKING SIZE! I saw all chunky everything last night. Chunky "sexy" cat woman, chunky "sexy" fairy, chunky "sexy" angel, chunky "sexy" chola.... No. Stop this. I know every female wants to be something "sexy" or "slutty" for halloween but for one, that shit has been done to death and two that shit doesn't come in your size. So cut it out. You don't look good and your friends are evil for making you think otherwise.
***We interrupt this post for an awkward moment***
That awkward moment a clique of seven girls walks in... And they're ALL the ugly friend. Yeah. I'm sad.
***...Back to our regular scheduled fuck shit***
Fellas, y'all gotta learn to respect the curve. I'm jumping around on the couch at Church and one of my niggaz homie decides to invade my sacred couch space to try and catch a bubble from the kid. Real shit homie musta grabbed my waist five times, getting curved each and every time. Plus my nigga was warning him to fall binack and in my nigga's own words he "doesn't fuckin' listen" because he was pressing' me like a space bar, word to Nicki. Ayo, I'm not trying to be coy or cute or play hard to get when I give niggaz the curve. I'm not interested, I don't dance with niggaz, and don't you ever... eva eva eeeeva... eva eva eeeeva.... Invade my couch space. There are plenty of females loose off that goose who will dance with you ON THE DANCEFLOOR. Basically... Fuck off.
Although my Molly poppin' days are done, it's obviously very popular amongst club folks. Many times with the females who don't party often and wanna "just have fun" for one night. I find 8 times outta 10 though, it's dudes offering girls Molly. So let me address those dudes right quick: stop giving ugly girls Ms. A hot girl looks happy and sexy (most times) if she's rolling. An ugly bitch on one makes you wanna dig out both eyes with a spoon on some Houston shit, and throw up on yourself. It's so unattractive. I mean, they already are, but let's not add fuel to the fire. They get amped and hyper and attract the wrong attention. Stop making these girls the laughing stock of the party. That's not nice.
Drink choice is just that, a choice. We drink Hennessy because it's a better drunk than Grey Goose. I tweet about it so much Hennessy should be cutting me a check (for the record there is currently a Hennessy shortage in Toronto... We go hard). More than a few people have told me they either tried or switched to Hennessy because of how much we praise it. That being said, don't go copying us then mixing with other liquors all night, then wanna blame the Hennessy. No. Hennessy didn't make you face plant on the sidewalk in the club district or vomit on the curb and lose your shoe. Your drunk liquor gluttonous self did. You know why you don't hear us complain about it? Why we still swear by it? Why we drink up to 6 bottles a weekend of it? Because we appreciate loyalty. We don't fuck with other alcohol so we don't get FUCKED by other alcohol the way y'all mixin' folks do. Whatever....choose as you please but don't blame #teamhennessy for a damn thing. We skraight.
The Articulate Bitch
I wanna make this the Halloween edition but since a lot of this applies on a regular club night ....
Ladies... Why are we still having this conversation? WEAR YOUR FUCKING SIZE! I saw all chunky everything last night. Chunky "sexy" cat woman, chunky "sexy" fairy, chunky "sexy" angel, chunky "sexy" chola.... No. Stop this. I know every female wants to be something "sexy" or "slutty" for halloween but for one, that shit has been done to death and two that shit doesn't come in your size. So cut it out. You don't look good and your friends are evil for making you think otherwise.
***We interrupt this post for an awkward moment***
That awkward moment a clique of seven girls walks in... And they're ALL the ugly friend. Yeah. I'm sad.
***...Back to our regular scheduled fuck shit***
Fellas, y'all gotta learn to respect the curve. I'm jumping around on the couch at Church and one of my niggaz homie decides to invade my sacred couch space to try and catch a bubble from the kid. Real shit homie musta grabbed my waist five times, getting curved each and every time. Plus my nigga was warning him to fall binack and in my nigga's own words he "doesn't fuckin' listen" because he was pressing' me like a space bar, word to Nicki. Ayo, I'm not trying to be coy or cute or play hard to get when I give niggaz the curve. I'm not interested, I don't dance with niggaz, and don't you ever... eva eva eeeeva... eva eva eeeeva.... Invade my couch space. There are plenty of females loose off that goose who will dance with you ON THE DANCEFLOOR. Basically... Fuck off.
Although my Molly poppin' days are done, it's obviously very popular amongst club folks. Many times with the females who don't party often and wanna "just have fun" for one night. I find 8 times outta 10 though, it's dudes offering girls Molly. So let me address those dudes right quick: stop giving ugly girls Ms. A hot girl looks happy and sexy (most times) if she's rolling. An ugly bitch on one makes you wanna dig out both eyes with a spoon on some Houston shit, and throw up on yourself. It's so unattractive. I mean, they already are, but let's not add fuel to the fire. They get amped and hyper and attract the wrong attention. Stop making these girls the laughing stock of the party. That's not nice.
Drink choice is just that, a choice. We drink Hennessy because it's a better drunk than Grey Goose. I tweet about it so much Hennessy should be cutting me a check (for the record there is currently a Hennessy shortage in Toronto... We go hard). More than a few people have told me they either tried or switched to Hennessy because of how much we praise it. That being said, don't go copying us then mixing with other liquors all night, then wanna blame the Hennessy. No. Hennessy didn't make you face plant on the sidewalk in the club district or vomit on the curb and lose your shoe. Your drunk liquor gluttonous self did. You know why you don't hear us complain about it? Why we still swear by it? Why we drink up to 6 bottles a weekend of it? Because we appreciate loyalty. We don't fuck with other alcohol so we don't get FUCKED by other alcohol the way y'all mixin' folks do. Whatever....choose as you please but don't blame #teamhennessy for a damn thing. We skraight.
The Articulate Bitch
Wednesday, 24 October 2012
New Music: Georgia Boys
Gotta love having dope friends from south of the border. Y'all know what it's like to have some dope music drop into your lap that most people haven't heard yet, you go HAM trynna put everyone else on. I'm bout to switch up and revamp your whole iTunes game with these three new Atlanta acts. I predict a blow up in the next 10 months ( kinda like I predicted with The Weeknd.. ahem... Yeah, I'm tooting my own horn *pause*). Soon you won't be able to make a move without hearing from these artists, so get to downloading!
First up is an artist I was first introduced to a couple years ago. Money Makin' Nique (also a member of Two9, but I'll get to that shortly) been doing this music thing for quite some time now. I gotta say as much as I love his voice and flow on these tracks, his production choice is what always blows me away. That distinctive ATL bounce is all over his mixtape. Check out the video for his recent single F.A.X Machine, featuring plenty of nudity and prometh inspired visuals. If you just had a breakup, this is definitely right up your alley....
Be sure to download the mixtape Gas Money and get your playlist game right.
Next we have an artist you may have already heard whispers of. Trinidad James is a Trini born Atlien with a serious gold fettish and a southern drawl you can't help but love hearing float over these bass driven beats. I'm head over heels in love with his single "All Gold Everything". It's on my "Getting Ready for the Club" playlist. Add it to yours and check out the DOPE video for the song....
Download the mix tape Don't Be S.A.F.E. HERE
First up is an artist I was first introduced to a couple years ago. Money Makin' Nique (also a member of Two9, but I'll get to that shortly) been doing this music thing for quite some time now. I gotta say as much as I love his voice and flow on these tracks, his production choice is what always blows me away. That distinctive ATL bounce is all over his mixtape. Check out the video for his recent single F.A.X Machine, featuring plenty of nudity and prometh inspired visuals. If you just had a breakup, this is definitely right up your alley....
Be sure to download the mixtape Gas Money and get your playlist game right.
Next we have an artist you may have already heard whispers of. Trinidad James is a Trini born Atlien with a serious gold fettish and a southern drawl you can't help but love hearing float over these bass driven beats. I'm head over heels in love with his single "All Gold Everything". It's on my "Getting Ready for the Club" playlist. Add it to yours and check out the DOPE video for the song....
Download the mix tape Don't Be S.A.F.E. HERE
Last but most certainly not least is the mega music group Two 9. Boasting a collection of collabos from Atlanta's best up and coming artists, Two 9's mixtape Two 9 Forever is a buffet of southern bounce. Not convinced yet? How about production/ Collabo credits from the likes of Juicy J, Meek Mill, Fly Union, Lil B, A$AP Rocky and Kreayshawn? Cosigns are cool and all but their music really does speak for itself. Check the ratchetly dope video for Scottie 2 Hottie me and Trap have been rockin' to since we got put on. PASS THE AMMO!!!
Get your click on and download the MIXTAPE pronto fam.
Follow all these artists on twitter and get familiar... the buzz is crazy.
@DJOSH_KOSH @ThatBoyCurtis @FATMANKEY @Daaaamien @RetroSushi @FAT_KIDS_BROTHA @WavyWallace @MoneyMakinNique @TheCoolIsMac @PjTheHero @GunnerSellWhite @TrinidadJamesGG
The Articulate Bitch
Tuesday, 23 October 2012
NWEE: Subtweet Life
I began this post quite a while ago but neglected completing it for fear of it sounding self-important. But the more time passed, the more I added and revised it, the more true it became for not only myself, but so many more people.
Now, the word "hater" is definitely in the top three most overused and misused words to grace our vocabulary. Overused mostly by the misusers. So let's begin by giving this word a concrete definition.
Hater - someone who responds negatively to a person they envy in some way, shape or form.
Simply disliking someone or something does not make a person a hater. Why? Because we can't all like everything. For example, I don't like lace fronts. Am I hating on girls that wear lace fronts? No, because hate implies envy, and really, what is there to be envious of? Exactly.
Why do females always make some outta pocket comment on some shit that really don't concern them and make it personal? If you gon' make a general statement by all means generalize away. But don't get specific then equate your bullshit comments about ONE person (ie subtweets) with a shared observation. For example: I sometimes say things about baby mothers. I already know it doesn't apply to ALL of them, and it doesn't apply to just ONE of them either. My statement is therefore GENERAL and not directed to just ONE angry bitch. But if you're speaking on something, strategically leaving out the name of the person, then referring to specific examples guess what? That, my friend, is a subtweet.
So, question: when y'all tweet hateful shit about people like it's funny, what reaction are you hoping for or expecting? You want a twitter confrontation? The back and forth banter usually started by the first person to grow balls and throw in an @ name. Subtweets? Where your opponent stoops to your level and rants aimlessly to their followers about some unnamed LAME. Real life confrontation? Are you expecting them to turn on their location so you can make the ahit real? Or do you just want them to feel bad and cry? I don't know who would, but some people are just fragile.
Better yet... The fuck u gon' do when u get NO reaction? You just wasted valuable TL slots to talk shit about someone who won't even give you the time of day. You dedicated tweet after tweet to them and they wouldn't give you even 140 characters. Thankfully you have me, to give you an entire blog post of shine. Heeeey! *waves*
I hope y'all get carpel tunnel from subtweeting niggaz.
The Articulate Bitch
Now, the word "hater" is definitely in the top three most overused and misused words to grace our vocabulary. Overused mostly by the misusers. So let's begin by giving this word a concrete definition.
Hater - someone who responds negatively to a person they envy in some way, shape or form.
Simply disliking someone or something does not make a person a hater. Why? Because we can't all like everything. For example, I don't like lace fronts. Am I hating on girls that wear lace fronts? No, because hate implies envy, and really, what is there to be envious of? Exactly.
Why do females always make some outta pocket comment on some shit that really don't concern them and make it personal? If you gon' make a general statement by all means generalize away. But don't get specific then equate your bullshit comments about ONE person (ie subtweets) with a shared observation. For example: I sometimes say things about baby mothers. I already know it doesn't apply to ALL of them, and it doesn't apply to just ONE of them either. My statement is therefore GENERAL and not directed to just ONE angry bitch. But if you're speaking on something, strategically leaving out the name of the person, then referring to specific examples guess what? That, my friend, is a subtweet.
So, question: when y'all tweet hateful shit about people like it's funny, what reaction are you hoping for or expecting? You want a twitter confrontation? The back and forth banter usually started by the first person to grow balls and throw in an @ name. Subtweets? Where your opponent stoops to your level and rants aimlessly to their followers about some unnamed LAME. Real life confrontation? Are you expecting them to turn on their location so you can make the ahit real? Or do you just want them to feel bad and cry? I don't know who would, but some people are just fragile.
Better yet... The fuck u gon' do when u get NO reaction? You just wasted valuable TL slots to talk shit about someone who won't even give you the time of day. You dedicated tweet after tweet to them and they wouldn't give you even 140 characters. Thankfully you have me, to give you an entire blog post of shine. Heeeey! *waves*
I hope y'all get carpel tunnel from subtweeting niggaz.
The Articulate Bitch
Thursday, 18 October 2012
Wicked Games
Remember when no one knew who The Weeknd was or what he looked like? We heard the voice and had no face to picture while our pupils dialated and teeth grinded while playing song after song. Those days are long gone, Toronto's favourite drug induced R&B crooner isn't hiding a damn thing anymore. We know the voice, we know the name, we've been to the shows, and out from the shadows we know the face. Let's play a game........
The Articulate Bitch
Wednesday, 17 October 2012
HEADLINERS
Headliners.
A city brimming with talent and a lust for life. Nights filled with music, culture and a pulse that sets the tempo for todays popular culture. The worlds eyes are keenly focussed on Toronto and how we do what we do. Headliners places focus on the beauty of night life and the beauties that live in it. This is the inspired life.
Chapter 01.
#headliners
October's hottest party is this Friday at Time Nightclub in Toronto....
Come witness the art of celebration.
The Articulate Bitch
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