6. People eliminate themselves. When someone shows you their true colours, believe them. I tend to be a passive aggressive person. Not everyone fucks with that but that's just who I am. I would much rather ignore a problematic person and have them simply vanish from my life without any effort to depreciate them on my part. Some people are into the arguing, confrontational approach. They like ending things with a bang. I don't. I find that many times we don't have to do much for people to either secure or lose their place in our lives. As a matter of fact it was Big Page who left me with this gem: "people self-destruct". Often times in our many relationships with various people we begin seeing true colors. Our first reaction is often to ignore or justify to ourself this change we see happening, because we care. But as time passes and those 'colours' become brighter and brighter they are harder to ignore. The thing to remember is that we can not control other people, what they choose to do is up to them. Therefor it is not our job to try to change them into a suitable candidate for our lives. If they prove themselves to be assholes/cunts we are obligated to believe them and let them go. No shade needed, they have already made themselves out to look bad without our help.
7. Petty things are a big deal. It took me a while to form this theory because it took so much personal strength and insight but let me explain. Petty actions, impulse reactions and small minded responses are not excusable simply because they're petty. In fact, these reactions coming from people tell you more than anything else, what you can expect from a person further down the line. Follow me here: someone disagrees with something you have said or done, but rather than speak on it like grown folks, they resort to pettiness. They express their discontent, just never directly. Why is this a big deal if it's so petty? Simple. If this is the way they handle small, easily solved problems, what should you expect when the big problems arise? More of the same (See #6). What makes it more of a big deal is the disappointment from having had your great expectations of an individual to be mature, tarnished by something so easily avoidable. The only valid response: smh.
8. Perception is reality. I always believed that it was most important what happened behind closed doors, rather than what we expose to the world. That character was more important than reputation. While I still whole-heatedly believe in integrity, we can not simply ignore the image we put out to the world in favor of only concerning ourselves with our private life. I'll use extreme examples: when I was in high school, I had a shit load of guy friends. I had girl friends too but my guy friends were my favorite. By the tenth grade I had only just had my first kiss and was so wildly self-conscious of my body, I wouldn't dare begin taking my clothes off for any other reason than to take a shower, much less sex. I was raised with and by men and found it easier to relate to my male counterparts. Yet rumors were circling that I was sleeping with certain guys, if not all of them. I started getting dirty looks and felt horrendously more awkward than I had before. I left high school a virgin, but according to high school, I was hoeing it up since 15. Yes people are small minded and childish but I had given them reason to believe the lies. I was always ditching class to hang out with the guys, attending all the football games and basketball games religiously, and forever huggin' up on my homies. Sure, I spent time with my girls but that wasn't enough to balance it out. Perception. My integrity may have been in tact but my dignity was destroyed without my permission. What's the lesson here? What you do privately is important, but what the world sees of us is equally if not more important. We have to carry ourselves the way we wish to be treated, because the world doesn't know what we do behind closed doors. Nor do they care.
9. New logic. I've been having a hard time comprehending the logic I see people subscribe to via social media. Yes, I'm talking about "twitter logic". Where there are very few grey areas or exceptions because somehow typing in 140 characters makes it gospel. For example the whole "you a hoe if...." or the many conclusions drawn on people of different races or sexual orientations. I snicker a how closed minded most of it is but I cringe at how many people truly live by those logics. Your favorite tweeter said it so it must be next to God's word Himself. Tragic. The days of individuality and personal opinion are dead. We instead just hit the RT button and cosign a statement so general it couldn't possibly be true. Real logic says that there is always an exception, even if we don't know of it or never encounter it.
10. I've been ignoring myself. I lost myself entirely in 2013 and it drives me to madness to even acknowledge it. I used to have the utmost confidence in everything I did. Every decision I made, whether it turned out well or not, I stood by. 2013 saw me compromise my sanity and truer self for the gratification of others. I ended up being confused, frustrated, tired, angry, sad and depressed. I went through some rough shit, as I'm sure many have. Truthfully I almost caved entirely and gave up on ever becoming the self I knew I could be. But I had so many good people around me, reminding me of the potential for greatness. I figured, so many people can't be wrong. So that's my resolution for 2014. To go back to my true self. At any cost.
The Articulate Bitch
